When you are hurting...

Someone reached out to me a couple of days ago to express how heartbroken

he feels. According to him, it was worse than physical pain and it felt as if his heart was literally bleeding. What a sad thing to experience!

So many thoughts were going through his head on what to do to get immediate relief but on the flip side, he knew that wasn't the solution. I was glad to know he still had the mind to think about something positive however all he needed from me was to listen and encourage him, (I am writing about it with his permission).

In my case when I experienced something similar some years back, I didn’t deal with it the right way. I allowed myself not to feel the intensity of the situation and acted like nothing happened; I built a gigantic wall in my heart. Of course, I later had to deal with it and I started wishing I had done that earlier. Being hurt isn’t only felt when a relationship goes south, the same level of pain could also be felt when a friendship or business partnership takes an unexpected negative turn.

Some negative ways that may get you immediate relief and a long term pain are:

- Total avoidance of the situation (not addressing it).

- Drug abuse.

- Transfer of aggression.

-  Express your emotions or insult the person on social media.

My suggestions for those who may be in this situation are:

- Talk about it with someone you can trust and will be willing to listen.

- Give yourselves some time, this may be hard but it will be worth it.

- Cry it all out but don't get sick.

- Express yourself through something creative.

- Avoid looking at photos that will bring back memories.

- Learn from the experience.

REMEMBER THESE

- There is no point watering a plant that refuses to let in your sunshine.

- It isn't the end of the world.

How have you dealt with hurt in the past?