By Kathleen Call me Gretchen Wieners, but instead of everyone else's secrets in my hair, I hide my own. What exactly do I conceal? The fact that my hair is always dirty. Call me a bad beauty assistant, but even with access to almost every shampoo on the market, I can't be bothered most of the time. Come over, have some tea, pull back my shower curtain, and take a peek. You'll find an overflowing shower caddy liable to break at any moment. Being a hoarder is pretty much in my job description. The washing and conditioning? Easy! It's the aftercare I can't stand. Just the thought of blow-drying my hair makes my arms hurt. Section, round brush, and then finish with a curling wand? I'll pass. So how do I convince the world that my most complimented hairstyle (simple Dutch braids) is just my "cool girl that cuts the line at Supreme drops" look and not my last resort? I don&'t, but if you see me with them, just know I'm five or six ...